I haven't posted here in a long time because I felt like I haven't needed to. I named this little blog space "Gin and Tonic Moments" because, to me, there is nothing more refreshing than a G&T. It's like the relief after a good hard cry. A little numb and raw all at the same time. Not hopeful, not pessimistic. Just being.
I took a really bad yoga class last week. At the end, as we laid to do constructive rest and were instructed to imagine the most peaceful place. Despite my frustration at how bad this class was, I knew exactly where I wanted to go.
I kick off floating amongst the anonymity of
endless reality
Still too far to reach the stars
Close enough to call this space my own.
So much of my time lately has been imagining myself in a space suit just floating in the vastness of nothing. Where some people experience existential dread, I experience existential freedom. I am unbound by the thought of being nonpermanent. I do not try to make a mark upon the world because I want to be remembered. I mark knowing time will wipe the slate clean, given enough time.
